begging you to come home...

To my greatest Confidant,

Please come home...



Sorry for such a selfish plea... Don't worry, I perfectly understand why you can't do so at the moment... They need you more than i need you now...

I've been meaning to tell you a lot of new things (old as well) that happened to me lately... Well, work is still good, i love what i do and i love the people i work with... and you know that i'm going to start another dreaded semester soon: teach, study and all other extra-curricular activities... (i know this is the part where you'd say, "hmmm, wag masyado paka-toxic... prioritize..." hehe) i know, i know... keri naman e! like what i've said: i love what i'm doing...

problem is, outside work, my world is just as chaotic as our politics (talking bout Phi)... the only difference is that, i'm working hard to resolve the chaos in my personal life, but in politics, hmm, can't do anything about it!!! hahaha...

well actually, it is not as bad as it seems, but it is quite difficult for me... kilala mo ako, i'm a fan of "quality friends" more than "quantity friends" and i'd rather live my life with 2 or 3 TRUE friends than be with tens and hundreds of UN-true people... but it's just hard to pick out who among the people around me are trustworthy enough to stay TRUE to me...

you know, people here are getting crueller and crueller by the day... one moment they're so good to you, next thing you know, they're already talking behind your back... and ayoko magmalinis, coz honestly speaking, i think i've been amalgamated with such an attitude... sheesh... hindi ko to kaya! dumadami sila! and wala ako kakampi... kelangan ko ng kakampi... i need someone who will remind me to stop being like them... i need someone who can defend me from all these crap... i can't face them all by myself... i need you...

i need you for so many reasons... i need you to boost my morale whenever it is buried 6 feet under... i need you to pick me up pag may ginawa akong kapalpakan... i need you because you "reprimand" (can't find the right term) me everytime may ginawa akong katangahan... and most importantly, i need you because you are one of the very FEW friends that i have na TOTOONG TOTOO! A two-fake-friends'-worth is nothing compared to your value alone.

i can't take anymore the lies, the conspiracies and all these crap that they always do... i mean, come on! gaano ba kahirap maging totoo? dba? perhaps wala na lang talaga silang pakialam kasi sa kabila ng sobrang pagsisinungaling at pagiging peke, nakakatulog pa rin sila ng mahimbing sa gabi! well i guess that's one advantage ng paulit ulit na nilang pagsisinungaling: na-engram na!!!

before i finish writing my letter to you, i'd like to say i'm sorry for, again, i've done something stupid! and probably this is one of the reasons why i'm having all this chaos in my "just-yesterday-it-was-ok-and-now-it's-a-messed-up" life... i must admit i am partly responsible for this disturbance in my life... let's just say that my loyalty to you was somewhat compromised after letting myself glance at someone whom i saw in the background(figuratively speaking)... apparently, that someone sucks big time! and i can't believe i've wasted too much time staring at him... i'll explain to you everything once i had the chance... right now, all i can do is to ask for your forgiveness...

i know that you have too many responsibilities to accomplish for you and your family, and i can't promise that i'd be less of a burden to you... but please, please please, i dont care how long it would take for you to get here, i dont care how long, but im willing to wait til the day comes when i would sit beside you, my greatest confidant, and feel as if no one could ever hurt me...

please come home...

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